I am no longer satisfied by having sex, sexuality and sex work discussed, researched and written about by men, or women with no experience doing sex work, with only limited sexual experience of their own, with bias, with limits, operating within the constraints of what currently exists, or highlighting problems that never get solved or truly addressed. I think its time for people with the relevant experience, knowledge and insight into anything to do with sex to speak up. We won’t ever get anywhere if we keep relying on inexperienced people sharing their thoughts on things of which they have only limited personal experience.
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Its been so long since I've written on here. I made another website cause I wanted something to show people without it being connected to sex. But now I'm stuck between the two, neither is my home. I have posted on the other site, but kept more recent stuff hidden. I wrote just on my desktop today. Just a dump of words. An expansion on the understanding of everything. I have been writing disjointed, unfinished dumps for a while as I have been otherwise occupied mentally. I decided to move back int the bus this winter and have spent the last few months prepping and moving out. Mom came to visit at the end of February and everything has been about moving since then. I have now been in the bus just over 3 weeks. And I feel lost and confused and disassociated. I mean, right this second as I write this I am having a massive wave of nausea and dizziness. I am listening to some Indian raga and have switched playlist about 10 times writing this paragraph. I am writing about writing and being confused as I don't know why I am doing any of this. Why do I think? Who for? To what ends? Why do I synthesize the information and search for new ideas? Why haven't I ever been able to stop thinking? What can I do with it all? Who could benefit from it? Who do I want to share it with and why? I…
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How I strive to experience the world. How I see other peoples insides.
The only space I have NEVER had negative interactions with men is in ADULT ENTERTAINMENT PLACES. As a "sex worker" I never once got raped, abused, harassed, or even made to feel uncomfortable. But in REAL LIFE?! I've had all of it, multiple times, from the streets to my own home.
Therapy doesn't work, porn harms people, feminism has ruined society, the culture is the problem. NO. The actual ideas are solid. It is LOW IQ people interacting with, misusing, misinterpreting or doing crap versions of the idea. It is the commodification of low IQ interpretations or ability. Not the idea or system itself.
Everything you think, experience, do, know, feel, IS your body. That is all it is. There is no mystical smoke animating otherwise dead flesh. All there is is your body. Without it you know nothing, think nothing, feel nothing. You do not exist. Everything you think the world is, that you have seen or learnt, is IN YOUR BODY. It is the ONLY reality. You cannot know what it is like to think, without a body. You don’t feel anything. Emotions are language simulations overlaid a PHYSICAL sensation. You are ONLY your body.
The worst part about having Asperger's is everyone else assumes you're a narcissist.— Sky Smith (@SkySmith_x) January 17, 2024
Not attacking RFK here. But it is yet another example of language being the simulation and manipulation. "All of us have to approach life with humility".....Why? "That means extending compassion and kindness". Why does a individual need to be humble, kind or have compassion? They… https://t.co/Mpah57JJIU— Sky Smith (@SkySmith_x) January 15, 2024
https://twitter.com/SkySmith_x/status/1746936293475664226?s=20
The understanding I have of how everything is structured is almost a model in my mind. Not an explanation, but a visualization. The map inside, the territory yet to explore, the plane of every day operations, language and where most people are. The external territory of places and people that expand your inner map. You inner map that is your knowledge of the world, places you have been, thing you have seen, experiences you have had, turned into landscapes. Everything you know about the universe is actually just you. There is nothing outside of what your body is currently experiencing. Everything else you are aware of, is inside you. The vastness of the universe, the infinite possibilities of life, all fit inside your physical body. The map has areas in you even you haven't explored. Dark forests and valleys, mountain tops, far away horizons. The more you know, understand, can navigate and can transmute the map, the more you know you map, the dark areas explored and found to be exciting and not scary any more, or areas you don’t want to go back to can be avoided, you can take new routes to unconquered peaks, you can move from one location to the next instantly, you can play in you, which is the universe, limitless, that can be carried out in the territory of physical realty.
My body, my skin, reaches out for you, for all of you, for every part of you.I want to envelop the soft flesh that holds your inner landscape,the map that is you.I can feel it through your skin.I can see everything your body has been. I want to hold and soothe and see all the pain and trauma, joy and freedom in your sinews. My inner map is open to you.There is enough space in here for all of you.Nothing here scares me. Use it as a way into you.Find where our maps overlap and walk into yours with the curious spirit of fearless adventure I have within me. I can see the map in you, in every muscle, in your skin, in what is seen as the body containing the soul within. Your body isn't just a vessel. It has been shaped and holds barely beneath a thin surface your experience of being you. I want to hold you and stroke you and soothe you, you all, till you can let go, till you can feel all the ways you've distorted being you, till you dissolve and become reborn as the supple, resilient, real you, under, in, of, the human animal you actually are. Let this embrace be the beginning of your journey to rediscover and embrace your true self, wholly and fearlessly." As I touched your skin, the sensation was overwhelming.The smoothness, your muscles, dissolved me from within.Existing only to focus on your body. Solely Breathless in awe…
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Touching your arm against mine Isn't a small gesture. It isn't just flesh rubbing flesh. It's not skin on skin. It's our inner maps melting together. It's you letting me in. It's a portal to a reality That only exists between you and me. It is a landscape, where only we can be. Every part of the body Is experiencing the smallest sensation. While the mind is blank and free. In a universe that can only be ours It is all of you. It is all of me.
Most people seem to think it’s better to be in a shit relationship with someone who makes you feel resentment, not yourself, and trapped, and to bring up miserable, dysfunctional, unhealthy and unhappy kids than it is to be alone. Alone you are supposed to learn to be the person you want to spend time with and the kind of person who would have a positive impact on other people. Not to fester and wallow in the shit person you are that makes good relationships impossible.
Without language, is there consciousness? To me there only seems to be awareness and memory. Memory, which is the back catalogue of moments of awareness. I had so much space and silence inside me on the drive home. My body feels so still and aligned. When I move I have constant ideas or complete awareness. When I come to communicate either experience, it seems so insignificant, ephemeral, small, compared to the sensation inside me. It is hard writing about language. But when the concepts flow through me it seems so obvious and simple. Can language capture the experience of awareness? How can "nothing" be so full of everything. Everything is nothing. In nothing is everything. To feel everything without language is nothing. It is vast space. Silence. Comfort. Euphoria. Contentment. Awareness. It is that what is right now, is enough. It is more than enough. It is over flowing. It holds within it all the individuals and their machinations, all the way down to ants, microbes, bacteria. And out into the stillness of every rock, tree, sunset, galaxy and infinity of the universe. Still on our scale. We are still on a microbe scale. With no judgement or language it all just exists. Everything. In your awareness. But there cannot be a why. Why involves langue. Awareness does not. You can marvel in awe without questioning why, or how. When you experience language free, mind body harmony, with your environment, is that the same level of consciousness that an animal…
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Sex today is as if we are living in a future where the only sport is basketball. In a future where we have lost all memory and record of the range of sports we currently have, there is only basketball. When someone says "Do you do/like/enjoy sport?" they mean basketball. They mean dribbling a ball, on a court and trying to throw it in a basket on a stick. There is a range of ways to engage in basketball, you can play alone in your yard. You can be a world famous professional player whos' whole life is basketball, playing to a ever increasing level of complexity. But there is no golf, football, soccer, gymnastics, etc. All the types of movement involved in any other sport is forgotten. This, is where we are at with sex today. Over the millennia, social conditioning and cultural norms and rules have slowly eroded our knowledge of the potential for sex and intimacy. We have forgotten how to move our bodies together in ways that create intimacy and community. We have forgotten how to communicate through our bodies. We have lost the cyclical nature of the female sexuality. We have lost the balance that roots our species, our sexual capacity. The first principle of being human is that we are sexed animals whos whole being has been designed over millions of years to reproduce. It is our guiding light and life force. It is why we are here and the only way we will…
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Simple. Not spiritual. Reality. Not myth. Sexed Animal. Correct Posture, muscle connection, aesthetics and symetry. Interoception. Embodiment. Feeling like a natural animal. Whole foods. Understand freedom and discipline. Play Experience space. Master the mind. Control perspective. Radiate, not react. Expand your energy rather than receive and react.
I've been going down a track on YouTube, my new special interest, of reaction and red pill videos. People who were liberal, progressive or woke and have seen the light. The light, they are finding, is called being red pilled. Moving towards a conservative, right wing, world view. I have been going through this process myself for a couple of years. My panic and fear at the direction the world was going, the reality of its current awfulness, the immense problems in all people, systems, experiences, everything ever that has been, is wrong, and it debilitated me. I wound up in bed for days and even weeks, for years. I felt like I was the only person in the world that could see the amount of reality in the world, that felt the pain and awfulness of every moment for every person. Even if people seeeem to be happy, if they are oblivious to how awful their lives are compared to what they could be if we changed all the priorites and system in the world to be what is best for the most human animals. I was heartbroken for every human that had ever lived. And thought I was the only person who could do anything about. The only person to see the whole picture. I dont know what sent me up the ladder out of these depths, there were many factors changing in my life that could be contributing. My work is consistent as is my schedule and…
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There is a reason I speak about things. I know. From experience. First hand. Many more truths than you can comprehend. Unless you too have the same quantity and quality of first hand experiences, you have absolutely nothing to say, or offer me. I'll add your data to my information pool, but it won't change anything I have to say, or disprove anything I have done and know. You are nothing. You are a point in an expansive data set that is my brain. So if you want to scream your differeing opinion or attack me about how I'm wrong, link me to your 15 years of writing, research and relevant experience, or set up your own platform and articulate your points, create, cause you cannot effect what I make or do, your experience of the world is up to you. I see your projection and low IQ takes. You are all midwits, loosers, fakes. Fuck off. I don't care if no one ever gets to see, or benefit, from what I know, from being me. If you haven't fucked 1000 men, 60% in a professional, legal, brothel setting, you cannot talk to me about male sexuality, sex, the human body, commodification, capitalism, female sexuality, society, sex work, porn, intimacy, peoples insides, intimate conversations, what men only show during sex, mental health, the human animal, fundamental needs. If you haven't been a sex worker for 13+ years, you cannot talk to me about sex work, porn, male sexuality, toxic cultures,…
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Testing using this off line. When I’m done ovulating I am in the perfect brain to get shit done. Do website. Write. Ovulation is free to be a sexy rebel. connect to body. Enjoy being horny. Generate balance and grace. Period is whatever I want. No socials. Post period, direct. Percolate. Look but don’t talk. Pre period. Delete social media. Walk. Move. Travel. Drive. Brain storm ideas.
Watch on Archive / BitChute / LBRY / Minds / YouTube or Download the mp4 What was World War One about? How did it start? Who won? And what did they win? Now, 100 years after those final shots rang out, these questions still puzzle historians and laymen alike. But as we shall see, this — Read on www.corbettreport.com/wwi/
Out with Kitty and Bussy for a reset after my trip to England. A bit lost in life. But finding myself in the spaces. A lot of my struggles can be relieved by soothing my body. Letting it relax, expand, dropping fight or flight responses. Only then can I find the freedom in my humanity.
How come you’re allowed to blaspheme but you can’t say anything antisemitism?! How come “they” get their own rules and get mad at everyone for way less blasphemy than committed against other religions all the time. Just talking about “them” is called antisemitism.
Experiencing without knowing? Empirical evidence for phenomenal consciousness without accessCan one have a phenomenal experience to which one does not have access? That is, can you experience something without knowing? The dissociation betwee…
A New Bodily Approach to Treat Depression and AnxietySwift, upward movements instead of slow and downward.